1. he won't wave at me
2. he never introduced himself when I moved in nor did he bake me a cake
3. he doesn't approve of my squiggly mow line
4. he kills snakes just for entering his yard
5. he doesn't think it's funny when I put snakes he's killed just for entering his yard in his mailbox
6. he knocks bird nests out of his trees every Spring (who does that?! and why?!?)
7. he cut down a tree because it leaned 10 degrees to the west
8. he sounds like a whining woman
9. his yard work shorts are too small
10. he's a fireman/paramedic but was the FIRST one to flip out when my dog ate his kid
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